EuroTrip - Day 55

L.O.S.T.

I have lost a couple of KGs since the start of this trip. The reduced waistline should worry me a little as I had done a lot of shopping for clothes just a couple months back before the trip. But I am the least bothered about it. Ghar jaakar I can makeup for it. What is worrying me now is that I seem to have lost my purpose. I stayed at home for a couple of days (that is apart from the Tuesday and Wednesday when we have our classes) to take a stock of events in my life. It has been two months since I am away from home. It's been two crazy months filled with hectic travel (and some customary visits to college stuffed in between) in length and breath of Europe. I call it my EuroTrip. Filled with its lows and highs, this trip has indeed been a good experience. However, it seems to lose it charm now. I am finding it difficult to prepare myself for another journey following the mundane routine that I have been using so far.

The news from the campus is that the Summer process has been really impressive this year. It's a good sign. Our Laterals and Finals should show a similar trend, we are hoping. My preparation for this 'most important element' of my MBA course is absolutely off the track. I am scared now to think that the decision that I took to enjoy these three months in Europe instead of toiling back there to improve my resume (and ofcourse knowledge) might be a big blunder. I am missing crucial months of my life in IIMA. They could make or break it. If I see the expectations that people around me have placed on me, I really feel now that I should have stayed back there in India.

I have seen a couple of failures in last couple of weeks. In some cases it was a couple of decision went sour while in others it was my own wrongdoing. I have a clear idea about my mistakes now but somehow the corrections required seem to be elusive. There are certain basic changes required in the way I live my life. I am finding it difficult at this moment to think of ways to achieve that. I wonder if some more introspection could help.

I am on my way to Munich now. This time I am traveling alone. That's the best thing that can help me at this moment. I should get some time to retrospect too. There is no fixed path in search of Peace.