koi dekh raha hai...

Recently I happen to visit this very interesting blog by Abhi. It's called my dayz with myself. Really interesting place for some good and light reading. One of the recent posts there dealt with a topic I wanted to write about for last few days. Have a look -

"But on a more Sushma Swaraj-ish note , Marine Drive shocked me in the same way a rusty old room cooler did when I tried to fil it up with water when I was eight . I mean , I am no Pandit Gangadhar Panduraam Shastri whose delicate sensibilities will be offended by an exposed ankle . But the way young couples choose to do 'things' not exactly in alignment with All India Mummy Papa Association over there was a little 'not-so-relaxing' for me to watch .Arre bhai , video dekhna hain to ghar mein dekho na , multiplex mein public screening kyun kar rahe ho ?"

So by now you will have full idea about the topic. Yes, I wanted to write something about public display of affection. This guy dealt with the topic in a very light and subtle funny way. But after my recent visit to Mumbai I really wanted to discuss it here.

On my way back from Indore, I had to take a break in Mumbai for around 4 hours. There Rout had come to meet me at the airport. As there was so much time, we decided to see some of Mumbai. We headed straight to Bandra Band Stand. Rout had not been there, and for me whole of Mumbai is a uncharted territory. (Why Rout wanted to visit Bandra Band Stand - To see Mannat, one reason for sure. Since he reached Mumbai, Rout has been trying to chase Bollywood actors).

Anyways, so here we were at Bandra Band Stand.
My first opinion about this place - a very dirty sea side with a very good jogging track. What is interesting (?) is to see so many young lovebirds. All hand in hand, eyes in eyes (and I don’t want t mention other things), not really bothered about anything/anyone else in this world. They really didn’t care about anyone else around them.

For public there, they were the center of attraction. More interesting then a cinema, coz you can see things that they don’t show in a non-adult film. There was something fascinating about such public display of affection there. It made me think of some questions.

Why do they need to show their affection in public and that to a place like a garden or beach?
Mumbai and for that matter any city in India, has no place for lovebirds. We still do not see these young souls with the same eyes as the kids in our homes. A young couple is always thought of doing something immoral. Our social stigmas and dogmas never allow us to accept a young guy and young girl's relation as something pure. They are always suppressed. So these people need to share their love with each other at secluded places like gardens and beaches far away from their homes. Most of them could not afford the safe and less disturbing ambience of Coffee Days or Baristas. But their love indeed needs to be explored. So they chose the less expensive options like these.

How do they get the courage to be so bold?
When I happen to see few such couples at Bandra Band stand, the first question that popped in my mind was - from where do they get the courage to do it so freely in public. There are couples smooching each others, and doing all the other possible exploration of each other. These all in a public places with so many people around. We still a part of society where this kind of actions would only be termed as crime. But still, there were so many of them, committing this crime. There was people watching them and laughing (why laughing? I could not understand). There were few rag pickers who just went close to them and stood right next to the couple. But still the lovebirds dint mind and did not even bother to do something else. They continued. What gives them the strength?

Strangeness. Yes it’s the strangeness of the public, of the surroundings, that gives them the courage. They can do anything amongst these strangers and still not bother about their parents knowing about it. Their parents would never know about it, and they still are a good boy/girl at their home. The guilt of doing something wrong would never pop up thus. With the influence of western culture, the physical attraction has become an almost indispensable part of a relation. So they take up the challenge of facing the world bravely and enjoy themselves. In one sense, it looks very valid. They know what they are doing and they own the whole responsibilities of the outcome. But on other hand, it does shocks the society, and people. Somewhere there always is the fight.

I don’t say its right or wrong. But my hats off for those brave souls.